This Girl's Heartbeat

When we are young, most of us don't dream of driving a minivan some day and I am no exception. I've always loved bigger vehicles and these last few years, my eyes have been set on an Expedition. We almost bought one two years ago when we bought the minivan but it was just right out of our price range.  And I wanted the minivan. With two little boys, it was exactly what our family needed - practical and affordable.   I didn't hate it.  I wouldn't say I was in love with it but I enjoyed it.  Sliding doors will change your life.  Just sayin! I've always been practical. Rarely will I splurge and buy on impulse.  My husband is the same way.  We research, we think, we pray, we talk it out, and then we wait a little while longer and then make a decision. But when that shiny new (used) Expedition with the AMAZING price tag was on the lot , we couldn't pass it up. We took it home for a night and I really liked it, but something just wasn't settled right in me. ...

  July 4, 2011, September 7, 2016, and September 18, 2018 The dates that God allowed me to be in the presence of sweet life being born.  Caleb, Samuel, and Judah.  Three of the most precious human beings I know.  The moment they took their breaths, I saw Jesus breathe life into this natural world.  What a moment! February 4, 2021 The date God allowed me to be in the presence of sweet life leaving this world.  My grandfather.  The moment he took his last breath, the moment I knew we were in the presence of angels, I saw Jesus allow a tired man to rest.   One moment.  One very powerful, important moment.  This last week, my God has taught me so much and has lit a fire inside of me that hasn't been there before.  An urgency. A reality.  It's sad that sometimes we don't truly and fully get the big picture of something until we are slapped in the face with it.   Pastor has been speaking a lot about how God will take the hard ti...

NO! We hate that answer. We want a yes.   We want a yes the way WE want our yes.   The way WE want things to go.  The way WE have made it up in our mind how our lives should work. But what do you do when He says no? Do you even give Him an opportunity to say no or do we not even ask Him? His yes will be determined by how we handle His no.   What do I mean by that? It comes down to obedience.   If you get into your car to go to a destination, there are certain roads that you shouldn't take.  Those roads may lead to dead ends, a bridge that's out, or  a detour that will take you hours away from your final destination. It's important to follow the directions to get to your goal on time and efficiently.   I think sometimes we obey google maps more than we obey God.  We put our trust in a computer program to get us to where we need to go more than we put our trust in an all knowing, all powerful God who can direct our lives and lead us along the p...

I think we overcomplicate living for Jesus sometimes.   I woke up this morning saying this to myself.   Like literally, opened my eyes and this was running in my head.   I'm an over thinker, and over analyzer, and over explainer.  I always have been and that has been a hinderance to me so many times.  Jesus is teaching me to just be.  Live for Him, speak to Him, walk in Him, and let Him work where He needs to work. Living for God isn't complicated. We make it complicated.   We feel like we need to fully understand all the mysteries of our Father and be perfect little human beings before we can accomplish anything in Him.  We try to "do" our way to his heart.  If we pray this amount, He will pick me. If we work this hard, He will approve of me. If we take out or add XYZ to my life, then He will accept me. We have it backwards. Because He loves me, I want to talk to Him. Because He loves me, I want to work for His Kingdom. Because He loves me, ...

I recently purchased this book called Women of the Word which was recommended to me by a friend.  It's a year long devotional of 52 women in the Bible.  I'm on week one and God is already using it to teach me.  EVE WHAT GOD SAID:  You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die. WHAT EVE TOLD THE ENEMY GOD SAID:  We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden, but God did say, "You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and  you must not touch it,  or you will die." WHAT THE ENEMY TOLD EVE:  You will not certainly die,  for God knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil. First -  Eve added to God's word. Second - so did the enemy. Seeing this leads me to ask two questions: 1. How of...

I'm right there with most parents. My kids have been driving me nuts.  As I write this, both of them have crawled up right on side of me to touch me for the 29,703,048 time today.  Can I just not be touched for one minute? Please? Can you not put your foot on my face and stick your little big toe into the side of my thigh like you're digging for gold? But you know what else I am? I am so very thankful. This quarantine has made me stop. I don't have a schedule to stay on. I don't have supper to fix by a certain time. I don't have things to occupy my time like grocery shopping, running errands, or taking those weekly trips to Target. I don't really have a whole lot of restraints on me other than to stay home and stop. Yes, my kids have been driving me nuts, BUT, I have been able to stop and just BE with them. I've been able to make blanket forts and color and tomorrow we're baking cookies.  I've had time...